Hoolis for Me Forever

Published on 2023-05-30 | Archived on 2024-01-22

Special thanks to Dougie for being a real mensch on the video-making.

Lyrics:

Let me take you down
Cause I'm going to Hooligans Pub
Write Tiny Tim drunk
And text back all the stalker childs
Hoolis for me forever

Writing is easy when you're drunk
Just type a bunch of gibberish
Until you hit that special word count and tweet about
How Tor should buy your shitty book

Let me take you down
Cause I'm going to Hooligans Pub
Meatloaf and suds
My stool can hold a metric ton
Hoolis for me forever

The truth is my wife needs some time alone
It's an agreement that we have
She gives me 50 bucks to go and larp as Hemingway
When I get back she queefs out farts